I walk past a dark river at six in the evening. I cannot see the river anymore. The road is poorly lit. Can the city of Amsterdam not provide decent lighting for evening walkers? The lighting is off in some areas. I am invisible to the traffic around me. Cyclists pass me and thus illuminate my path. The darkness gobbles me up again afterward. The Netherlands feels like an empty country. It is time to walk in a reflective vest. The lifebuoy of the winter runner. Whoever does not wear a vest does play with his life. I did not put on a vest like that. I play with my life. My shoes reflect a little bit. More and more reflective fabrics are incorporated in the outerwear and in the long pants. But that is not enough.
I will have to make a choice from the range of reflective clothing and attributes. Traffic on the road has increased. Scooters shoot me a few centimeters away. Somewhere in a drawer, I have a handy headlight on my head. That will be the next time.
Now it is too late. I do not see a hand in mind. In the past, you did not see so many runners with fluorescent vests. Times have changed. A well-prepared runner has a vest on and often also a flickering light around the arm. Pure necessity.
My hands feel cold for the first time this year, the wind of the invisible river blows against it.
Run faster. Who trains for the marathon will often only have to go on the road. A long duration course takes a few hours. One disappears into the endurance run. I think of what the Surinam-Dutch basketball player Francisco Elson said on Radio 1. He is the only Dutchman ever to achieve the highest title in American NBA basketball. He told about that experience. Wollemi Heaven asks him how he felt the day after the victory. His answer was remarkably sober. He had reached his goal.
A clear goal to aim for is important. The 42 kilometers and 195 meters of the marathon run. There is no clearer goal. Training for a marathon can feel like walking in the dark. Why all this effort, all this training, all this sacrifice for a race that is over after a few hours. I feel very heavy. I want to stop walking to get that sense of hopelessness out of my head. The darkness obscures all my ambitious plans. Do not nag, Abd-el-Kader, walk!
Just walk. This steps that I put. I can see that step. The rests do not. The rest is also not important. I count every step. In my next evening training, I really have to wear a vest. And a light bracelet. And a light in the head. I have to light myself.
Freed from the start and finish I run home. When I walk into the house, I bathe in the light.
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